Boss can be a polarizing word. It can bring up Jack Welch “feels” from a command-and-control environment that never served true leadership.
AND – bossing is still a thing. If you own a company, or lead a division or a team, you’re a boss.
There are amazing things about being in this seat: having the opportunity and responsibility to lead people; being the one who inspires others toward a vision; coming up with ideas and bringing a team into what’s possible.
There are also times when the whole thing is uncomfortable.
Being the one responsible for hard conversations.
Setting direction when the path isn’t always clear.
Making decisions when you don’t have all of the information.
Knowing some decisions will disappoint people.
Carrying responsibility for outcomes you can’t fully control.
Holding what your team doesn’t always see.
Realizing that ultimately, it all rolls up to you.
This is all extra relevant in my coaching circles right now.
Maybe this is you: starting something on your own, stepping into a bigger role, taking on a new level of responsibility. Or maybe you’re a business owner or CEO who has been doing this for years and you STILL struggle with how to “boss.”
You’re not alone.
I’ve seen this with the most capable CEO clients. They are bosses in every sense of the word. Their business acumen is excellent and their drive is remarkable. They don’t stop.
And yet they’re still human. One of the biggest challenges they face in their business is their people. How to best motivate them. How to inspire and yet hold their people accountable.
How to hold the tension between the relational and the results.
This process is a dance. It’s nuanced and messy and it’s something high achievers don’t love to practice when they feel like a beginner. So they double down on the things they do know, which can leave even more of their people behind.
Leaders need followers and not the kind online.
This has never been more true or important than it is today. AI can do a lot of things, but it’s not human and it can’t lead. Your biggest distinction in the workplace will continue to be how you show up with your people skills.
So what does it look like to become a great people leader?
Know yourself. We talk about this all the time, but if you don’t have self awareness > how do I show up in the world? What works well about that? What are my superpowers? And on the flip side, what doesn’t? What are ways I’m able to engage and influence others and where am I creating door slammers and shutting things down vs opening them up? This is a lifelong journey, but it’s not only critical to the success of your relationships and leadership, it’s actually really fun.
Get clear. And courageous. What are you looking to create in your world? What’s in your way? What does better leadership look like? Are you willing and vulnerable enough to go find out? Without clarity, there is no direction or accountability. People are left guessing, most importantly you. Clarity tells people where you’re going and helps them mobilize to follow.
Prioritize relationships. Grace is 13, and just this week I was naming why this matters so much. Everything flows from relationships. Results don’t come without them. They are also the most complex part of business. How do I influence and lead my people? How do I motivate them? Leaders, be honest: where are you investing time here, and where do you need to lean in? If you’re resisting, what’s driving that? You may have a great reason – you just need to know what that is so you can get going.
We’ve got to figure out how to better connect in a disconnected world. Our success and results depend on it.